Too Young to be Trapped

They say that I am too young,

that I will never be able to leave.

My family wants me to stay, trapped

and holding onto a life

that I do not want, that carries no direction.

I search and strive for ways to get my freedom.

Staying in the town I was raised in would strip me of the freedom

that I desperately want. No matter how new, how young

I am, I know that I need to find my own direction.

College, or trade school, or travelling, something that lets me leave

behind the life

that is the only thing I have ever known, that has kept me trapped.

I am trapped

in my old room with my old purple bed sheets. Freedom

awaits the young girl who loves her family but dreams of a life

that is full of new adventures and new people, both young

and old, who will give her experiences that will leave

her with the mark of the world, with a new direction.

People who love me have been pointing me in the wrong direction.

It seems as if they want me to stay trapped,

to stay small, to stay listless, to never leave.

It is heart- breaking to fight for my freedom

from people who so obviously love me. Young

and scared of the new world, I falter in my determination to leave my life.

But there has to be a better, more fulfilling life.

A life where I can choose the direction

that I want. I am not too young

to make my own decisions about my future. Trapped

is not the life I want to live. I can have the freedom

to be a nurse or a writer or a paramedic. The freedom to leave.

Will they still love me if I leave?

I wonder how my family will change if I change the course of my life.

Will they be okay? Or will they think that I don’t love them because I chose freedom?

I hope they soon understand that my direction

in life does not affect how much I love them and that they don’t make me feel trapped.

I hope they know that I will love them even though I need to leave them young.

I am not too young

to realize that I can and will choose to not be trapped

in the life that seemed to be set for me. Instead, I will choose my own life, my own direction.